​Ok so I have to share this because in hindsight it’s pretty funny.  Picture me in Walgreens…dealing with well… Walgreens…my coupon for stuff didn’t work so I had to reapply for it online and of course this takes a whole extra 3-4 minutes.  During this 3-4 time limit I notice an elderly lady get behind me in line…now im not talking 60-70 range I’m talking 78-88 range….
Now I came to the Pharmacy in what I thought was in great preparation for my check-out.  In & Out bam done…no not my luck…so this little old lady is becoming increasingly impatient with each passing second.  And yes, I say second.  She is huffing, puffing, etc because apparently my “rowdy” children are insufferably being children and running amuk around me as I attempt to save myself 150$ dollars.  
With each passing second this little old lady is progressively inching closer and closer to me and then somehow her hand basket is at my heels.  I notice it when i feel a little bump from the hand basket as it hits my heels.  She put it directly in the path of my children so they cant run from the seats I told them to sit in and back to the register where i am standing. (5 Foot gap at most). 

Apparently she thought this was a clever move…my kids just stepped over it because well, they are not toddlers and have hand eye coordination with the capabilities of stepping over objects.
So after several jumps back and forth of kids, and me nearly finishing my coupon application, the old lady has made her way up beside me and ask in the most nasally high pitched hateful voice….
“Can you not just take care of my prescription, while shes doing that, (points to my phone) and send her (points to me) to the back of the line.” 
I look up at her… Eyes wide with shock at the audacity of this little old lady and respond for the cashier. 
“I’m almost done, I think you are capable of waiting for your turn.”  I turn back to my phone and in less than thirty seconds my coupon was submitted and ready to hand to the cashier… But I held onto it for a few moments extra to be a brat.  

At this point my youngest child thought she was going to be a chicken going around clucking and flapping her wings… I told her she made a cute chicken.  My oldests child’s mouth fell open in utter shock… I handed my phone to the cashier pretending not to notice the look of awe from my oldest daughter.

I don’t normally encourage my kids to be bratty… i don’t normally encourage my kids to misbehave in public… But… This…. woman….whom I have never laid eyes on mind you, decided to bark up the wrong tree and errked me on a bad day.  
I usually save this facade of mine for the IRS but hello Sally this lady… Between her huffs, puffs and “could this take any longer” and “oh my gosh” comments..it just got to me today. 
Finally the other cashier (2-3 minutes have passed) decides to ask the lady if she needs assistance… How did the lady respond you ask? Well let me tell ya…
“Well it’s about time, I got in the wrong line, you have already checked out 5 people and this one still hasn’t moved!”  As hateful as you could possibly imagine.
At this point I’ve been really trying hard to keep my mouth shut… I mean this woman is old… Really old… If I use the wrong tone we might have a cardiac event.  So I simply turn to her and gesture with my hand to go to the other line, with a big smile no less. 
I thought she was done… I thought, she’s finally getting waited  on and she will keep her snide rude hateful comments to herself now and stop glaring at my kids and me.  

No… No… No… That didn’t happen…sideways stares…still complaining but she was at least more focused on her problem now that fortunately for karma was more complicated than mine.  
The pharmacist at this point had came to my register.  He was having some issues with the coupon turns out it was a quick fix…. And he resolved my issue.  I couldn’t resist this Golden opportunity… It just presented itself in such prestine magnificence!
I said, “Sir thank you so much for your (look at old lady elevate volume of my voice) PATIENCE. IT IS CERTAINLY A VIRTUE FEW HAVE THIS DAY AND TIME.” I look back at the pharmacist and the cashier and continue.  “I really can’t thank you enough.”. I think at this point my skin is stretched so thin it might year from my smile. 
The pharmacist is talking at this point but I don’t really hear him.  I’m too busy congratulating myself in my head for lecturing the woman on PATIENCE.  I’m just smiling and nodding as if my passive aggressiveness is something to be proud about… I feel the need to do it again so as I try to focus on the words coming out of his mouth.  Sounds like he is asking if I need anything else. 
“No sir, but I can’t stress enough how much your PATIENCE (stare at lady) means to me.  Thanks again.”
I’m maniacally laughing on the inside now because I’m getting long sideways glances.  Oh she heard me and will hear me again and again before i leave…..I can’t laugh yet… Just can’t do it…
So the cashier proceeds to ring me up… Again.. It’s ok at this point I take advantage of every opportunity to demonstrate or say the word patience….I tell her so…
“No worries I’m not in a hurry…I have all the PATIENCE (smile and stare at old lady) in the world.”
The cashier finally processes everything I pay and I’m done.  I can’t resist one last jab because the lady is still standing there her issues nowhere near resolved.  I look at the cashier and smile as I take my stuff…
“I really appreciate your great customer service, your (stare at old lady) PATIENCE, (back to cashier) was above and beyond, Thanks Again.) 

I think she was about to crack up at this point. She wasn’t dumb she knew what I was doing.  I did appreciate her putting up with my snarky comments and rambunctious kids though… It’s tough working customer service.
Thanks for reading my vent…


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